The God of 5 Loaves and 2 Fish

It's been a transforming few weeks - challenging - but overall a great blessing for our family. First, I was offered a new position which sounds like a great fit for me and giving us the provision we've been praying for our family. You'd think I'm thrilled. Not really. I've struggled about this because I have grown to love so much being with my little Ean. I love seeing firsthand the changes in him...the new words he learns each day....his personality developing...and most of all just letting him know how much I love him by being with him. To be honest, I've been upset with God. I don't understand why He's calling me back to work.

Thankfully, He has done such amazing things in our family and especially in our marriage that Carlos and I really support each other now. And, the other night when I was sharing with Carlos my heart about how much it pains me to leave Ean again, he reminded me that this life is not just about us. God has been casting a vision in me for orphans. He has now provided the job for us to proceed with adoption (what we believe to be the first step in this journey). So, how can I see what's ahead? What is coming in the future? All I can hold on to is Christ and His provision for us....and who can doubt how big He is if you've seen all He's provided for us during this season.

You see, just as we found out that I was offered the new position, Carlos' found out that his was ending. In God's perfect timing, He provided what our family needed. At times I think that what I pray is too big for God and other times I don't bother asking because it seems too small. I read in my devotion this past week something that really struck me. It said:

"What is your need? Whatever it is, it is entirely God's concern. He may instruct you in it, and the obedience is yours to carry out; but the provision is His."

So, I'm starting this new season seeking to depend consistently on the Lord who fed thousands with a mere 5 Loaves and 2 Fish.