The Wife of Noble Character

My deepest prayer this season....
Proverbs 31:10-31 "The Wife of Noble Character"

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.

In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers
She opens her arms to the poor.
and extends her hands to the needy.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity,
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her.

"Many women do noble things,

but you surpass them all."

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Give her the reward she has earned,

and let her works bring her praise at

the city gate.

Our Journey to Ethiopia - Part 4

Day 3 in Addis Ababa

It's our last day in Ethiopia - crazy if you consider we only spent 1 full day there! It felt like we were here much longer.

We tried again to get our bag at the airport - no luck. Then, we returned to the guesthouse to pack. We had made plans for Tsion and Wegi's aunt and sister to meet us for shopping. They were gracious in helping us find all of the things we wanted to bring back, and I'm sure at better rates than we would have gotten on our own (although Carlos is quite the negotiator).

They arrive on foot and we follow them out of the gates. To this point, we had not walked anywhere - it had all been by the van provided by our agency.
It just doesn't seem like the "I'm going to take a walk place!"

We walked to the main road and quickly realized we should have arranged for a taxi at the guesthouse. We walked and walked. The sites, smells and sounds were totally different "outside of the car." Carlos asked about a taxi and they explained that we had to be on the other side of the freeway. Now, I must say I've seen many near misses during our time in the city where people walk causually in front of the cars. It seems to work for them, but I am not convinced I have the skill (nor do they:))

So, we finally reach the "taxi" which is not what we were expecting....they told us to hop on the van/bus full of Ethiopians and we realize now we're really "among" them. We both were a little taken back especially as we rode on one after antoher. It seems we're pretty spoiled with the convenience of our own private car. Carlos suggested a smaller (private) taxi, but they felt it was too expensive. In hindsight, I think we were perceived as wealthy, but certainly $.62 for a cab ride was dirt cheap to us!

They took us to a large market which was a really cool experience. They explained that we had to be careful with our bags, and Atkilt held my hand as we shopped. What an amazing memory! We also had a great lunch at a place called Lucy's - very nice. Then they invited us back to their house for coffee ceremony.


It was pretty humbling...they walked us up a stone path to the very "shacks" we'd been seeing...to their village. I'm sure we made quite the scene - definitely the kids were curious about us. I was really surprised once inside. The small room was carpeted with couches and TV. It was nice.

They were very gracious. She served us water while she roasted the coffee right there in the living room

. We enjoyed popcorn and took pictures of their family . It was a very special moment for us.

Outside the door, the kids kept running by and looking in. One girl caught our attention. A very dark skinned girl in a pink dress - she was beautiful and a huge big smile and so much life in her eyes. We learned that her mother died an that she was actually from the Congo. Carlos knew that they speak French there, so he started to speak with her. Her face lit up! He asked if we could take her picture and she agreed . Oh, how I could see the potential in her if given the opportunity. Afterwards, we took a taxi back to the guesthouse to pack and prepare for our 11:30pm flight home.

Standing in the airport, I had a range of emotions. Excitement to see Ean, confusion if there was a problem at court, wishing we didn't have to return but could bring Evy home with us now. So, the journey continues and we'll wait to see what God has for us next.

Our Journey to Ethiopia - Part 3

Day 2 in Addis Ababa

Day 2 started very early - 2:30am Addis time. After tossing and turning, I finally go up to check the time and considered going downstairs to the computer since I could not sleep. When we finally got up, we grabbed a quick breakfast then met the others for our 8am call time to leave for court. Much like everything in Ethiopia - 8am was a "range" so we left around 8:30am. We entered a small room where we were to meet the judge. It was a long wait (or at least it seemed) before we started.

The room was full - I would say at least 30 families from various agencies. One by one, they went exiting in less than a minute with tearful eyes of excitement until it came to our turn...the judge was very unemotional and straight forward. She asked us a series of questions that we basically answered "yes" or "no" then mentioned something about another court date. We sat there confused then she and the lawyer spoke in Amharic - turned to us and said "thank you." Are you kidding? In my heart, I really wanted to hear" she is yours" like the rest of the families. I was confused and disappointed. We asked the lawyer afterwards and he assured us everything was fine, but I wasn't convinced. I know that she isn't anymore ours than is our son BE. They are God's children. I had just longed to hear those words. This has been such a long process of waiting yet it appears He plans to keep us there longer. Sadness. Confusion. Disappointment. At that point, I just wanted to go home. I was tired, missing Ean and beginning to emotionally detach from it all.

After court we went to the guesthouse to change close then to have lunch at a small coffee shop. OMG! It was so bad. I think I've learned how to stay away from meat...since there are so many hidden "mysteries" :)

We then went to the care center to say goodbye to our children. It was hard to imagine leaving Evy there
. We played and enjoyed her - then felt rasping when she was breathing. We were all a bit on edge about sickness with the kids. Two in our group were hospitalized after we arrived and one dear family lost their baby the same week.

Needless to say, we were on edge and not feeling extremely confident. We asked if the doctor could check her lungs (since we were concerned the Pneumonia could return). After a while, they came in and said we were taking her to the hospital. I was so scared. I was able to carry her to the car and be with her the entire time. It was crazy thinking about how they drive - jerking her from here to there and no carseat! I held her tight. Another family brought their child as well and one of the nannies joined us.

The hospital was definitely that of a third world country...but the doctor was so nice and you could tell he really loved our daughter. She knew him and was very at peace with him. He reassured us that overall she was doing well but needed antibiotics for a respiratory infection. Good news - just hard to think about leaving her knowing how easily those kids pass sickness around in their full bedrooms and just praying that everyone there will be attentive if she gets worse.

As I was sitting there talking to the doctor, I discovered she had a massive poop. Super nasty and smelly and of course I ended up with a handfull - yuck! The doctor asked if I would change her, but I didn't have diaper or any supplies. He looked at me like I was crazy. We finally got her cleaned up including new clothes. We walked outside and discovered the rest of our group. All of a sudden the head nurse took her from my arms - and she was gone.

I didn't realize that was goodbye! Emotionally exhausted I asked the driver if we could please skip the shopping and return to the guesthouse. As it turned out, it was fine. We shopped a bit then headed back. We found some great stuff!

So, back to the bag. After all the calling to the airport, we decided to go there in person. Our bag was nowhere to be found! Ugh. Later, we joined two other couples for a dinner at a nice Italian restaurant. It was fun and gave me a little sense of being home which was certainly reassuring after the stress of the day.

Our Journey to Ethiopia - Part 2

About 30 minutes later we arrived at the care center. The sites and smalls were amazing. Tons of people, cars, horns beeping, smog, beggars and not to mention the crazy driving (it makes NY look like child's play). It all was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. The holes in the road - well, that's a different story...painfully slow and rocky like a boat.

It was purely a miracle and God's grace that I did not get car sick (I can't even go to the mountains without getting sick). Honestly, I expected to not feel well, but the Lord kept me safe and healthy. Aside from lack of sleep and emotional exhaustion, both Carlos and I felt really good. The dry air definitely does a number on your sinues and skin though.

When we arrive at the care center all of the other families are with their children. We slipped off our shoes and sat down. A few minutes later, they came out with baby W. She had a hat on her head and was so tiny. Those huge big eyes - I knew it was her! The head nurse explained that she had the hat because they shaved part of her head (since she had been hospitalized). What a shock - we had no idea. As it turns out, it was 10 days prior and she spent 4 days in the hospital. So much to take in. Even though we were exhausted and still trying to process this foreign land - we now had Evy in our arms after all these long awaited months. It was surreal.

I would describe Evy as:
- smiley - the report was very accurate
- outgoing
- very verbal
- well developed in terms of skills for her age
- petite
- very aware of her surroundings
- intentional - she studied our faces
- affable
- seemed to love music and dancing

Sadly, she also showed signs of self soothing tendencies - but a really special little girl.

They brought solid food for me to feed her - she didn't want very much. We were surprised when they told us she eats every 3 hours - crazy for 9 months old. I'm guessing they do what is easier for them to manage schedule-wise. After only 50 minutes (we missed the first part), we departed for lunch.

They drove us to a privat golf club for lunch
. Hard to believe Carlos and I both ate for $10.00. It was a pretty outdoor space nestled among all of the dirt roads. A woman passed by
with a large load on her back - a reminder that few actually afford the golf club compared to millions struggling on the outside. When I went to the restroom, a woman poured water from a bucket to wash my hands - her job was tending the bathroom. I've seen this often in Europe - people demand money for their service BEFORE you ever enter the restroon. This was different. She was gracious and unassuming. When I came back a second time and tipped her, she softly said "God bless you" with a warm smile. What I gave her equaled less than 1 American dollar.

It's really crazy if you think about it - $1 USD = 16 Birr. We could buy things so inexpensively yet I thought how just a little from our family could go such a long way - but how?

Next we drove all the way across town admist more honking, dodging cars and an occasional donkey or sheep to the Holt office to meet with the legal advisor in preparation for our court appearance. We reviewed a few questions then went back to the care center to see our children again before bedtime. Remember, at this point we've been up since Tuesday morning and it's now Thursday evening in Addis.

When we arrived at the care center, Evy was in her jammies. It was sweet to see her again, to play and pray over her. We also met with the pediatrician to ask questions. Naturally, we wanted to know about the hospitalization and other growth milestones. After saying goodbye, we headed back to the guesthouse and ordered dinner - it's now about 8pm Ethiopia time. We are beyond exhausted.

The staff at the guesthouse are amazing. They offered us their cell phone and even purchased a calling card for us to call home. I couldn't go to sleep before talking to Ean. That was definitely harder than I thought it would be. After I told him I loved him, he said "you always come back." (Something I always remind him of when I leave him for preschool) I couldn't hold back the tears. Then his dad said hello and he asked "where's daddy?" over and over. Service was intermittent and it died on us several times. Afterwards, Carlos and I just sat there and cried.

Eventually, we grabbed a quick bit of food and took my first shower in 3 days in ice cold water! I couldn't have cared lesss - I just wanted to be clean. As it turns out, there was a mistake with our room so they gave us the master suite. It was huge - much more than we needed, but God was gracious in providing. That night was so restless...and possibly the hardest bet I've ever slept on. It felt in essence like sleeping on wood...thus the end of Day 1 in Addis Ababa.

Our Journey to Ethiopia - Part 1

What a crazy journey this has been...really starting for us earlier this year when we began the adoption process. There have been so many ups and downs these last 9 months. Hmm, just realized that is the actual "pregnancy time frame" - just long enough for Him to birth something in me and our family. Yet, as I board the plane heading home I am still not clear on what "it" is.

For sure, there is a great need in Ethiopia, but how does that awareness intersect with our lives? I am amazed at how gracious and warm the people are in spit of living such a difficult life. They are so "service" oriented.

It's been an exhausting yet exciting journey. I guess the "re-entry" begins now. Searching for clarity of the vision.

The trip itself was full of many problems from the 11 hour delay and almost missing the time to meet our daughter to loosing our luggage - really a hard start. Yet, I think about John's blog - The Orphaned Briefcase and I now see how much time I lost fretting over that silly bag instead of being in the moment. That is the story of my life - can't see the forest for the trees. Sigh. I hope I change.

So, back to the reason for this trip - our sweet Evy. Admittedly, I feel emotionally detached regarding her right now. I think in part because we are forced to leave her, also due to the uncertainty of our court appearance, and lastly because we had so little time to bond with her. (I think after some time of reflection, it's likely more self-protection).

The first day of the trip was insane. For starters, I really didn't think I could leave Ean. The night before, I told Carlos I couldn't go. He reminded me that Ean is God's son - not our own - and that we have to trust Him. Not to mention the fact that we are following His heart for orphans by bringing Evy into our family. Somehow we managed to pull out of the driveway but not before waving over and over to Ean as he sat in the front window. I had no idea how deeply I loved him and how much I'd miss him until that moment. Carlos and I cried and prayed for him as well as our safe return.


The drive to Atlanta was stressful. It poured rain all the way. We arrived with only a few minutes to spare. Then, just before we were to board, we discovered that our flight was delayed. Great. We had a few hours to connect in Frankfurt so we thought we'd be ok. As it turned out, it was a 3+ hour delay and our hopes of making the connection were diminishing. I was devastated - what if we miss seeing our daughter and our court date?

I tearfully pleaded with the airline staff to help us rebook and shared with them about our adoption. They were all so supportive and yelling well wishes as we boarded the plane. We went to sleep immediately with the help of our "happy sleeping pills" then we woke 2 hours before we landed to discover that we would be arriving 2 hours late for our connection. No one on the flight could help us rebook (which is not what we were told in Atlanta)!

When we arrived, we ran to the Luthansa desk to discover hundreds of people in the same situation as us! What a nightmare. People were pushing and yelling. No one would organize a line. I started to cry. We've flown halfway around the world to meet our daughter, and it looked hopeless that we'd make it in time...not to mention that I wanted to see BE. We waited 3 hours in line to be rebooked. Thankfully, they allowed us to place 2 calls back to the U.S. - one to our agency to alert them of the delay and the second to BE back at home.

Regardless to say, we were exhausted. We did manage to find a great restaurant and enjoyed much needed food. Yummy.

We were re-routed via Ethiopia Airlines which required another 2 hours in line to get boarding passes - but at least we were on another night flight so we could enjoy our "happy pills." :) We woke up 2 hours before the end of the flight again to discover we would be arriving 2 hours later than expected. Now, we're expecting the next ball to drop.

After an 1 hour wait in customs, we finally grabbed our luggage to discover that our big bag didn't arrive. I tearfully announced to the security guard that Carlos would stay behind for the bag, and I would go ahead "We're adopting and I can't miss meeting our baby!." He graciously took us past the line to the office to submit a report. Thank you God!

We exited to a sea of Ethiopian faces - it was a bit intimidating at first. Finally, I located a Holt sign and met our sweet driver. I felt bad for him - he had waited for us 4 hours due to all of the delays. I quickly announced to him that I wanted to go to the care center to see our baby (since the time we were allotted to meet them was already underway). Funny, they listen but still do their own thing:) Instead, we went to the guesthouse dropped our luggage and started our first of many adventures across town...