Sunday, June 26, 2016

The Rhythm


It's been way to long!  I was reading a post I wrote 4 years ago to Ean yesterday.  We talked about what it means to use and not waste the gifts God gives you.  For him, it's the gift of music.  For me, in part, it's sharing what God reveals to me through words.

Over the past few years, I've had a number of friends tell me I should write a book about parenting.  Really?  Have you been in my house at dinner time and witnessed the chaos?  Have you heard the yelling when I ask my oldest to put away his laundry?  

In all seriousness, none of us are perfect parents.  We wake up each day hoping it's better than the one before and pray that we don't repeat the same mistakes.  So, let's just put it out there and be real with each other.  None of us are perfect.  All of our children will need some level of therapy when they're older (we live in a fallen world after all) and hopefully we gave our kiddos just enough of the good in us that they will turn it into something even better!

Thankfully, God has been very gracious in my parenting journey.  Oftentimes, I feel a bit alone and then He'll speak through a song or give me a word that gets me back on track.  When summer break started this year, I admit, I had anxiety.  How in the world can I be there for my kids and my work commitments?  Then, it came.  The quiet voice that reminded me that I don't have to do it all, but I do need a rhythm.

I'm not talking about an awesome dance party (even though that is one of our favorite things to do on the back porch - sorry neighbors).  I'm talking about a way to approach our day.  I love spending time with my kids biking, at the movies, eating lunch, swimming, or just hanging out at home, but we always have a rhythm.  When my husband is home on the weekends, I tend to huddle up indoors and crank out as much work as possible.  There is NO rhythm.  I call it free-range parenting and it makes me a bit bonkers.  Granted, the weekends are when my kids literally run from our yard to the neighbors all day playing.  It's wonderful and I know they're creating memories that will last a lifetime - but there is no rhythm.  Want to know what happens when there's no rhythm?  Nothing good.

During summer, when we don't have the pressures of school anymore, we establish our much needed rhythm.  I discuss with the kids what we want to do for the day.  We set goals of things we need to accomplish like putting away our clean clothes, mowing the grass, running errands, etc. We decide what is the one outing we want to do together that day.  Then, we put our plan into motion.  Our rhythm plan includes rest.  Oh wait, your child will not rest anymore and they haven't since they were 2?  Well, I challenge you.  If you build into your daily rhythm, a time when your child rests or reads quietly in their room, you will be surprised how much things change.

Our kids still need time for their bodies to grow and as I say "percolate."  They run so hard during the school year.  Rest is how their body resets.  We always start summer with drama and tears over rest time being part of our daily rhythm.  Yet, within a week, everyone is sleeping (sometimes up to 2 hours) during rest time.  I am amazed how much it helps our day.  We are less irritable, we focus better on our work, we laugh more, and we can stay up later to enjoy those long summer nights!

If your schedule is flexible and your kids are home during the day, I encourage you to give it a try.  Kickstart your day with a plan, set goals, prioritize a time of rest, and embrace your family rhythm!